What the Hack: who was there? (And not+)
Bill Gates Died
Bill Gates passes away and goes up to heaven where he is met by God.
"Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you created that ghastly Windows.
"I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."
Bill replied: "Well thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?"
God said: "You take a peek at both places briefly if it will help you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?"
"Sure" said Bill, "Let's go!"
Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear water. There were thousands of beautiful men and women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect.
"This is great!" said Bill. "If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven."
God replied "Let's go!" and so off they went to Heaven. Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell.
Bill Gates though for only a brief moment and rendered his decision.
"God, I do believe I would like to go to Hell."
"As you desire," said God.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill Gates shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.
"How ya doing', Bill?" asked God.
Bill responded with anguish and despair: "This is awful! This not whatI expected at all! What happened to! the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh THAT?!" said God. "That was the Screen Saver."
You know Stone's 'Hidden History of the Korean War'?